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A Rash of Trash
He has no idea where all that litter comes from. It just seems to form magically overnight like dew.
Really ugly dew.
Handley Stanley often picks up litter when he's traveling 'round da hood on foot:
One day recently he picked up all this litter along just six blocks:
And another day he picked up the little dewdrops shown below on just one block of Haynie Street. It's a disgrace, no ifs, ands, or
It's enough to make even someone like manly Handley Stanley feel sadly:
To compile a profile of the average litterbug, sleuthful, truthful, always couthful Sherlock Stanley recently examined the evidence he had collected over several weeks.
"Very instructive," he declared at last.
He deduced that the average litterbug smokes filtered Marlboros, drinks Bud Lite, and buys lottery tickets.
"And," Stanley adds, "isn't a very good neighbor."
Handley Stanley thinks that people who litter don't respect the rest of us very much. And if they don't respect the rest of us, they don't respect themselves. Because even ol' Styrofoam Dome knows that each of the rest of us is just them in a different jumpsuit.
For a man by nothing is so well betrayed as by his manners.
--Edmund Spenser
| Home | Mathematics of Manners | A Tale of Two Pronouns | For Crying Out Loud | No Blankety Blinker | A Four-Letter Word | "See Y'all 'Round da Hood" |